Swamp Creatures Beware: The Boss Is Back

Donald Trump’s CPAC 2025 speech was a greatest hits album of America First policies, with a few new tracks on cleaning out the bureaucratic rot. Federal employees refusing to work in-office? Fired. The Southern border in chaos? Day one: national emergency. Foreign aid boondoggles? Cut. Tariffs on China? Love ‘em. Trump laid it all out: he’s sprinting to dismantle the deep state, send freeloaders packing, and put America’s interests first. He even highlighted the absurdity of Social Security fraud with beneficiaries aged 220+ (because apparently, America’s retirement system serves Highlanders). On international conflicts, he didn’t mince words—Russia’s Ukraine invasion and the Israel-Hamas war wouldn’t have happened under his watch. The speech was classic Trump: blunt, high-energy, and dripping with disdain for bloated government. If you’re a bureaucrat, a globalist, or a fan of open borders, consider this your eviction notice.